31.10.11

Geography lessons

Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa - half discovered,
half wild, fertile and naturally beautiful!


Between 23 and 30, a woman is like Europe - well-developed
and open to trade, especially  for something of real value.


Between 31 and 35, a woman is like Spain - very hot, relaxed
, and convinced of her own beauty.


Between 36 and 40, a woman is like Greece & gently aging,
but still a warm and desirable place to visit.


Between 41 and 50, a woman is like Great Britain, with a
glorious and all-conquering past..


Between 51 and 60, a woman is like Israel - has been through
war, doesn't make the same mistakes twice, and takes care of
business.


Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Canada - cool,
self-preserving, but open to meeting new people.


After 70, she becomes Tibet - wildly beautiful, with a
mysterious past and the wisdom of the ages.... an
adventurous spirit and a thirst for spiritual knowledge.


THE GEOGRAPHY OF A MAN


Between 1 and 90, a man is like Iran - ruled by a couple of
nuts

World's population hits 7 billion - World - Canoe.ca

World's population hits 7 billion - World - Canoe.ca:

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Woman in PSL accused of violating probation to have sex - Off the Beat with Will Greenlee

Woman in PSL accused of violating probation to have sex - Off the Beat with Will Greenlee:

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Netflix, Amazon can boast new Disney deals | Media Maverick - CNET News

Netflix, Amazon can boast new Disney deals | Media Maverick - CNET News:

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Google handcarves 1,000-pound pumpkins for Halloween | Technically Incorrect - CNET News

Google handcarves 1,000-pound pumpkins for Halloween | Technically Incorrect - CNET News:

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Cyanide & happiness


School bans Halloween costumes - Weird News - Canoe.ca

School bans Halloween costumes - Weird News - Canoe.ca:

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Halloween trick? not for him...


today in pictures:






















The Pour Man: Aged beer is something to celebrate - Chicago Sun-Times

The Pour Man: Aged beer is something to celebrate - Chicago Sun-Times:

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'Jon and Kate' Editor Arrested for sex exploit of a minor

'Jon and Kate' Editor Arrested for sex exploit of a minor:

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Heidi Klum Halloween costume 2011: Dead body pictures from her annual party | Mail Online

Heidi Klum Halloween costume 2011: Dead body pictures from her annual party | Mail Online:

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Caffeinated jerky and Zapplesauce: Adding kick to the military’s tough-to-swallow MRE - The Washington Post

Caffeinated jerky and Zapplesauce: Adding kick to the military’s tough-to-swallow MRE - The Washington Post:

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I Heart Chaos — An off-duty cop going 120 on the interstate gets...

I Heart Chaos — An off-duty cop going 120 on the interstate gets...:

with video goodness!
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Woman offers undercover officer sex for $17 | officer, sex, undercover - Northwest Florida Daily News

Woman offers undercover officer sex for $17 | officer, sex, undercover - Northwest Florida Daily News:

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Anonymous Takes on Mexican Drug Cartel Los Zetas | TPM Idea Lab

Anonymous Takes on Mexican Drug Cartel Los Zetas | TPM Idea Lab:

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Sacto 9-1-1: Break-in suspect sounds Sac Metro fire truck siren before being detained

Sacto 9-1-1: Break-in suspect sounds Sac Metro fire truck siren before being detained:

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Death threats ends in charges for 14-year-old girl - Crime - Canoe.ca

Death threats ends in charges for 14-year-old girl - Crime - Canoe.ca:

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The Onion's fake story no laughing matter for Santa Rosa institute | PressDemocrat.com

The Onion's fake story no laughing matter for Santa Rosa institute | PressDemocrat.com:

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Dilbert


Picture that make you smile:





















Golfing Truths:

Don't buy a putter until you've had a chance to throw it. 
Never try to keep more than 300 separate thoughts in your mind during your swing. 
When your shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either hit one more club or two more balls. 
If you're afraid a full shot might reach the green while the foursome ahead of you is still putting out, you have two options: you can immediately shank a lay-up or you can wait until the green is clear and top a ball halfway there. 
The less skilled the player, the more likely he is to share his ideas about the golf swing. 
No matter how bad you are playing, it is always possible to play worse. 
The inevitable result of any golf lesson is the instant elimination of the one critical unconscious motion that allowed you to compensate for all of your many other errors. 
Everyone replaces his divot after a perfect approach shot 
A golf match is a test of your skill against your opponents' luck. 
It is surprisingly easy to hole a fifty foot putt . For a 10. 
Counting on your opponent to inform you when he breaks a rule is like expecting him to make fun of his own haircut. 
Nonchalant putts count the same as chalant putts. 
It's not a gimme if you're still 5 feet away 
The shortest distance between any two points on a golf course is a straight line that passes directly through the center of a very large tree. 
You can hit a two acre fairway 10% of the time and a two inch branch 90% of the time. 
If you really want to get better at golf, go back and take it up at a much earlier age. 
Since bad shots come in groups of three, a fourth bad shot is actually the beginning of the next group of three. 
When you look up, causing an awful shot, you will always look down again at exactly the moment when you ought to start watching the ball if you ever want to see it again. 
Every time a golfer makes a birdie, he must subsequently make two triple bogeys to restore the fundamental equilibrium of the universe. 
If you want to hit a 7 iron as far as Tiger Woods does, simply try to lay up just short of a water hazard. 
To calculate the speed of a player's downswing, multiply the speed of his back-swing by his handicap; i.e., back-swing 20 mph , handicap 15, downswing = 300 mph. 
There are two things you can learn by stopping your back-swing at the top and checking the position of your hands: how many hands you have, and which one is wearing the glove. 
Hazards attract; fairways repel. Keep this in mind 
A ball you can see in the rough from 50 yards away is not yours. 
If there is a ball on the fringe and a ball in the bunker, your ball is in the bunker. If both balls are in the bunker, yours is in the footprint. 
It's easier to get up at 6:00 AM to play golf than at 10:00 to mow the lawn 
A good drive on the 18th hole has stopped many a golfer from giving up the game. 
Golf is the perfect thing to do on Sunday because you always end up having to pray a lot. 
A good golf partner is one who's always slightly worse than you are....that's why I get so many calls to play with friends. 
If there's a storm rolling in, you'll be having the game of your life. 
Golf balls are like eggs. They're white. They're sold by the dozen. And you need to buy fresh ones each week. 
It's amazing how a golfer who never helps out around the house will replace his divots, repair his ball marks, and rake his sand traps. 
If your opponent has trouble remembering whether he shot a six or a seven, he probably shot an eight (or worse). 
It takes longer to learn to be a good golfer than it does to become a brain surgeon. On the other hand, you don't get to ride around on a cart, drink beer, eat hot dogs and fart, if you are performing Brain Surgery !!!!

Best Halloween Costume Ever: Use Two iPads to Create an Awesome Gaping Hole in Your Gut

Best Halloween Costume Ever: Use Two iPads to Create an Awesome Gaping Hole in Your Gut:

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Citizenside Sells Your Newsworthy Photos and Videos

Citizenside Sells Your Newsworthy Photos and Videos:

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The 30 Most Unsettling German Halloween Costumes | Cracked.com

The 30 Most Unsettling German Halloween Costumes | Cracked.com:

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